So, some of you probably thought I was going to say something about that crazy movie with this title from my childhood (late 80s, I'm guessing). Not so. This is about MY OWN recent adventure in babysitting.
This weekend, my sister Tami needed to take a coaching class in Lyman, so I agreed to watch her boys yesterday and today while she was in class. Then my sister-in-law, Angela, was in the hospital this week with her new little baby, so I had her boys as well on Thursday night and Friday. So all totaled, I had 7 kids under 7 all by myself on Friday. I wasn't too worried. I'm a veteran mom with a batchelor's in elementary education, and a self-awarded honorary degree in problem solving. I could handle it, right?!?
Well, Tami left for class a little before ten, and I had decided that I would have a very small to-do list that day: laundry and keep children alive and happy. So we all went down in the basement and played for awhile. Thirty minutes went by, and I thought, "This isn't going to be so bad. Things are under control." Then Mylie asked if we could make brownies. Great idea! What could be more fun?
When I asked who wanted to help, I ended up with three takers: Mylie, Jaxon, and Tel (Tami's 2-year-old.) Since we were making brownies from a box, things started out really easy. Jaxon put the mix in, Mylie cracked the eggs (no shells!) and I did the water and vegetable oil. Then it was time to stir! We decided the kids would take turns. Mylie stirred for a bit, then Jaxon, then Tel. Right about then, Mariah came into the kitchen wanting a drink. I left my post at the counter and headed to the fridge. As I started pouring the milk, I heard Mylie say, "Okay, Tel, my turn now." And then Tel said, "No. Not yet." Mylie insisted and reached for the spoon. Tel saw it coming, and pulled back hard. He lost his balance and feel off his stool onto his back. I figured we could deal with that--but only for a second, because then I saw the bowl full of brownie batter rocking back and forth, teetering closer to the edge of the counter. And then it went over.
I rushed around to the other end of the counter to assess the damage. I instantly had a "Mom reaction." (I'm not talking about moms in general here, I'm talking about MY mom.) "AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!" I yelled with my fists clenched. Then I took a deep breath, and in that instant I realized that Mom's similar reactions, to which I would usually say something like, "Calm down, Mom. It's not that big of a deal," never meant "This mess is much too large to handle." What those reactions actually meant WAS: "I DO NOT HAVE TIME TO DEAL WITH THIS RIGHT NOW!" I realized that I actually did have time to deal with it, since the only thing on my to-do list for the day was laundry. So I proceeded.
The batter had not been completely moistened, so the powdery part of it had poofed all over in Tel's right eye, ear, and all over in his hair. The batter had splashed all over his clothing, and the nearby cupboards, but most of it was on the floor under the upside down bowl. Needless to say, he was not impressed. In fact, I think he didn't stop crying for at least fifteen minutes afterward.
Because of all my work toward my honorary problem solving degree, I could see that if I were to rush Tel off to the tub right away, the two toddlers would have a hay-day in the batter, and I would have an even LARGER mess to clean up. So I stood Tel in the corner (feeling like a mean babysitter) and made him wait there while I scooped as much of the batter as possible back into the bowl, then wiped off the floor and cupboards. Then I finally got to Tel. We got the messy clothes off and into the wash, and him into the bathtub, still crying. By the end of the bath, he was okay.
I wandered back into the kitchen and Mylie asked if we could still have brownies. Of course, I thought. Isn't there a bowl full of brownie batter sitting on the counter? So I gave it a good stir and poured it into a pan. And yes, we ate them. (Now, before you lecture me on the sanitary implications of my decision, try taking care of 7 kids under 7 who all want brownies. Then ask yourself if you really want to start the entire process over after the first try ended like it did. And to further defend this disgusting decision, none of us got sick. So there.)
Luckily, the rest of my weekend was MUCH less eventful! (And I even accomplished my to-do list: laundry, happy children--well, mostly--and they are all still ALIVE.)
The Hearts of the Children
3 weeks ago